Why Dont We Listen Better Second Edition +book Review

• Home
• My Books

Open Preview

See a Problem?

We'd dearest your assist. Permit us know what'due south incorrect with this preview of Why Don't We Listen Improve? past Jim Petersen.

Thanks for telling usa about the trouble.

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, delight sign upwardly.

Reader Q&A

Exist the first to ask a question virtually Why Don't Nosotros Listen Better?

Customs Reviews

 · 253 ratings  · 28 reviews

Start your review of Why Don't We Mind Meliorate?: Communicating & Connecting in Relationships

This review is actually the first page in a "book report" I had to do for this book. Honestly, I started this book with incredibly depression expectations only I accept a feeling that, outside the Bible, this will the most influential book I will accept read all year.

Jim Peterson wrote this book as a means to foster good advice, specifically through the forgotten art of effective listening. Although he is coming from a background of nearly fifty years of pastoral counseling, what he teaches in this b

This review is actually the first page in a "volume study" I had to do for this book. Honestly, I started this book with incredibly low expectations simply I have a feeling that, exterior the Bible, this volition the most influential volume I will have read all year.

Jim Peterson wrote this volume equally a ways to foster good advice, specifically through the forgotten art of effective listening. Although he is coming from a background of nearly fifty years of pastoral counseling, what he teaches in this book can be used in every aspect of interpersonal communication. [Jim Peterson, Why Don't We Listen Better? Communicating and Connecting in Relationships, (Portland, OR: Peterson Publications, 2015) thirty.]

The book is a combination of iii concepts: Flat-Brain Syndrome, the Talker-Listener Menu, and a drove of thirty-three listening techniques. The Flat Brain Syndrome is Peterson'due south explanation of why people speak or human activity out of a negative place. In his theory, a person is made up of three parts: emotions (breadbasket), the centre, thoughts (head). When a person's emotions are overloaded, this squeezes out the heart and head. The issue is a "squished" or "apartment" encephalon that does not speak or recollect every bit rationally as information technology should. When a person recognizes that someone else is speaking out of a "Apartment-Brained Syndrome", they have the opportunity to either respond in kind or intermission the bike providing an opportunity to settle the emotions and restore reason. Equally Peterson writes, "The more than you sympathise people, the less there is to forgive." [Ibid., 58.]

The second part of the volume introduces the Talker-Listener Menu (TLC). This is a two-sided card that Peterson uses in his counseling every bit well as a variety of other scenarios. One side of this card shares the Talker's goals, to own the trouble and share their feelings, and also conditions, to talk without accusing, attacking, labeling, and judging. The flip side of this card is for the listener. The listener's goals are to provide safety, to understand, and to clarify. The listener agrees to listen without like-minded, disagreeing, advising, or defending. Well-nigh the purpose of this carte du jour, Peterson writes, "If nosotros take turns, that is, focus on one point of view at a fourth dimension, we literally can't debate." [Peterson, Listen Better, 97.]

In addition to these two parts, Peterson has thirty-3 listening tips that run through the course of the book. Nigh chapters end with one of these tips as well as a page or two of caption. Sometimes, these tips align well with the previous content of the chapter, only non always. In his preface, Peterson said he placed these tips throughout the book so that the reader tin can begin practicing them as they read. [Ibid., vii.]

...more

Easy read that can increase our listening skills. Something we all need to work on! He keeps it simple and interesting.

Narcissistic beliefs has escalated off the charts in the last 30 years. What nosotros demand are non more talkers, only rather, more listeners. I know in my ain personal relationships and conversations I have institute that I can plow the person into a project to try and solve their "trouble" or "predicament" in 30 minutes or less. This book only spends 50 pages or so on how to solve issues with the other 200 pages solely on how to listen amend. After reading some of the techniques, I had a potent desire Narcissistic behavior has escalated off the charts in the last 30 years. What we demand are not more talkers, only rather, more than listeners. I know in my own personal relationships and conversations I accept institute that I tin can turn the person into a project to endeavor and solve their "problem" or "predicament" in 30 minutes or less. This book only spends fifty pages or then on how to solve problems with the other 200 pages solely on how to listen improve. Later on reading some of the techniques, I had a potent want to have some conversations only so I could try these out these new listening techniques. I didn't agree with every method mentioned, however, a vast majority of them proved quite helpful. I know that I will be continually practicing and coming back to this book to amend my listening skills ...more

Sep 03, 2010 Erin rated it it was astonishing

Recommends it for: EVERYONE!

Yes, my female parent was right, I DID need to read this book. Actually, Anybody should read this book. And at present that I've read information technology, I need to go buy my own copy to continue on hand.

Jim Petersen does a wonderful job of explaining how we go "flat-brained" when nosotros're under stress or under attack, and I dear that he besides gives concrete steps and techniques to utilize to recover from that and open up communication lines back up by actually and truly LISTENING to what other people are trying to tell us. We definitely ne

Aye, my mother was correct, I DID need to read this volume. Actually, Everyone should read this book. And at present that I've read it, I demand to go purchase my ain re-create to keep on hand.

Jim Petersen does a wonderful job of explaining how we get "apartment-brained" when we're under stress or under attack, and I love that he also gives concrete steps and techniques to utilise to recover from that and open communication lines back up by actually and truly LISTENING to what other people are trying to tell usa. We definitely need the Talker/Listener cards to utilise in our abode, and I may create one to take to piece of work with me, as well.

...more

Jun 20, 2011 Kimwa rated it it was amazing

I'm well into Chapter 6 and this book is definitely exceeding my expectations. The author is a seasoned Christian counselor and utilizes very applied information and methods to become a better listener, besides every bit a talker. The amazing thing is that while he doesn't directly infuse scripture into his writing, information technology becomes very articulate that the methods that he'southward proven to be most constructive actually betoken the reader to the give-and-take of God and becoming more Christ-like to truly make the methods work in E I'm well into Chapter 6 and this book is definitely exceeding my expectations. The author is a seasoned Christian counselor and utilizes very practical information and methods to become a better listener, also equally a talker. The amazing thing is that while he doesn't direct infuse scripture into his writing, it becomes very clear that the methods that he's proven to be most effective actually point the reader to the word of God and becoming more Christ-like to truly make the methods work in EVERY type of relationship. ...more than

Adept read for those looking to be better listeners.

Aug twenty, 2011 Ramona Stone rated information technology it was amazing

Brings new understanding to how people communicate. Explains barriers to agreement and how to overcome them. Information technology is simply a must for whatsoever counselor.

Nov 27, 2020 Nick rated it information technology was amazing

This volume stands up well a decade later. We need help with listening more ever, in fact; our tribal social club has made it more than difficult than it was in 2008 when the book was published. The primary point is straightforward: listen more than yous talk, don't pretend to listen and actually prep what you're about to say, don't talk past each other, and so on. Peterson has lots of skilful techniques to listen meliorate, including paraphrasing, reflecting back, returning to a conversation started earlier, i This book stands upwardly well a decade later on. We need help with listening more than than ever, in fact; our tribal society has made it more than difficult than it was in 2008 when the volume was published. The main point is straightforward: listen more than you lot talk, don't pretend to listen and actually prep what you're near to say, don't talk by each other, and so on. Peterson has lots of good techniques to heed better, including paraphrasing, reflecting back, returning to a conversation started earlier, identifying the underlying emotions, interrupting frequently to check that you've hear correctly (but not for long) and and so on. It would be interesting to get the writer's have on how the ii political sides, left and right, might heed better to each other in these parlous times. ...more

Jul 21, 2020 Brittany J. rated it it was amazing

"My seminary preparation in Greek, Hebrew, theology, Bible and church history hadn't prepared me for this job."

This is a book that will serve as a tool and reference throughout ane'southward life, be information technology in professional or personal relationships. I guarantee that no matter the number of times this work is revisited, readers will always find something new to pick (back) upward or purposefully apply in their daily lives and conversations.

This volume was an piece of cake read, with a lot of very helpful and practical tools to be a amend listener. I'll refer back to this oft for that reason!

The illustrations for his theories were difficult to follow and I had a difficult time with the lack of biblical or psychological basis for the book. I would have loved a deeper approach more grounded in scripture and research, but I sympathise that wasn't his goal in writing this. Overall, a very practical and helpful book that is approachable!

A must read

This book is very applied and good for all relationships. I think everyone should try this book at some point.

Jun 08, 2018 Lauren rated it it was amazing

Everyone should read this book. I mean everyone!!

Right on!

This has helped me tremendously and it is also very supportive of my christian organized religion.

I become a better leader, wife, mom, and grandmother.thank you.

Practical book

Very detailed volume, easy to read, well visualized . This book is a swell tool for relationships on daily basis.

April 05, 2022 Holly rated information technology information technology was astonishing

Fantastic instruction book to help us all larn to mind to each other better. Engaging and fun.

Book 40 of 2020. This volume is deceptively simple. Petersen explains how oftentimes we think nosotros're listening to others, but instead, in practice, nosotros are simply sharpening our arguments and waiting for our turn to talk.

He explains "apartment-brain syndrome" or how our emotions keep us from thinking conspicuously and speaking wisely. He gives many, many listening techniques to try.

I would have appreciated some footnotes and backup inquiry. However, many of the things Petersen said fabricated perfect sense to me. The i

Book 40 of 2020. This book is deceptively simple. Petersen explains how often we retrieve we're listening to others, simply instead, in practise, we are simply sharpening our arguments and waiting for our plow to talk.

He explains "flat-brain syndrome" or how our emotions keep u.s.a. from thinking clearly and speaking wisely. He gives many, many listening techniques to attempt.

I would take appreciated some footnotes and backup enquiry. Notwithstanding, many of the things Petersen said fabricated perfect sense to me. The ideas and the advice are pretty simplistic and are ofttimes empathetic common sense. However, living out these ideas is terribly difficult. ⭐️⭐️⭐️💫

#bookstagram #books #seminary #pastoralcounseling #bookreview

...more

I read this book for a class, but I'd recommend it to anyone who wanted to work on existence a ameliorate listener. Information technology was total of applied suggestions and ideas, and the author wrote the books with the intention of it existence useful for both educational reading likewise equally personal reading, so it is very readable and doesn't read like a textbook. At the end of each chapter the author provides a listening technique that tin be put into practice any fourth dimension. I plan to hold on to this volume and refer to information technology agai I read this book for a form, only I'd recommend it to anyone who wanted to work on existence a better listener. It was full of practical suggestions and ideas, and the author wrote the books with the intention of it beingness useful for both educational reading also as personal reading, so it is very readable and doesn't read like a textbook. At the finish of each affiliate the writer provides a listening technique that tin can be put into practise any time. I plan to agree on to this volume and refer to information technology once again in the hereafter equally I work on becoming a better listener. ...more

Foundational reminders

What I actually enjoyed about Petersen'due south text was the manner in which he transforms listening skills (or lack of) to concrete and visual beliefs, action, and/or reaction. Making that identification tin can assist individuals recognize the behaviors in themselves and brand any necessary modifications. Bravo Petersen! I know I certainly had to brand some critical adjustments in my listening skills!

Foundational reminders

What I really enjoyed about Petersen'due south text was the manner in which he transforms listening skills (or lack of) to concrete and visual beliefs, action, and/or reaction. Making that identification tin help individuals recognize the behaviors in themselves and make whatsoever necessary modifications. Bravo Petersen! I know I certainly had to make some critical adjustments in my listening skills!

...more

The second edition of "Why..." is a major improvement on the original, which was a great book. The new layout, with communication tips after each chapter were helpful and made it a lot easier to pick up what the writer was putting down. I highly recommend this book and definitely suggest the second edition over the first. Both are good, but the new layout really makes this edition polish. The second edition of "Why..." is a major comeback on the original, which was a great book. The new layout, with communication tips after each affiliate were helpful and made it a lot easier to pick upwards what the writer was putting downward. I highly recommend this book and definitely suggest the 2d edition over the kickoff. Both are good, but the new layout really makes this edition shine. ...more

Nov 11, 2013 Brandi rated it it was amazing

I enjoyed Mr. Petersen's use of sense of humour in this book. He took an frequently light-hearted approach to many serious issues that impact people'due south abilities to communicate and listen effectively. He too offers a lot of useful advice on how to address these deficiencies in listening skills. Overall, I found a lot more than useful tips that I can utilise in this book than I have in many like books. I enjoyed Mr. Petersen'south employ of sense of humor in this book. He took an often light-hearted approach to many serious issues that touch people's abilities to communicate and listen effectively. He likewise offers a lot of useful communication on how to address these deficiencies in listening skills. Overall, I establish a lot more useful tips that I can use in this book than I take in many similar books. ...more

Good, piece of cake, well written

Of the advice books I've read over the terminal few months, this was the meliorate of the iii. The format was simple and the writing was easy to follow. This is certainly something that couples tin can exercise together and talk over to improve communication

Skillful, easy, well written

Of the communication books I've read over the last few months, this was the meliorate of the three. The format was simple and the writing was piece of cake to follow. This is certainly something that couples can exercise together and hash out to improve advice

...more

May xviii, 2016 Skylar rated it it was astonishing

I'd recommend to anyone wanting to feel heard and wanting to aid people feel understood. Great read with adept menstruation. I'd recommend to anyone wanting to feel heard and wanting to aid people feel understood. Great read with skillful flow. ...more than

Sep 22, 2010 Patti rated it information technology was astonishing

This was for a Pastoral Counseling class but it was super! Highly recommend

Great book

This book will heighten your communication abilities. It is going to teach you lot how to effectively listen to others. I highly recommended this book to all people.

Read nigh half of it and so put it down.

Interesting perspectives on relationships and listening.

Jim Petersen has been on Navigator staff since 1958. He pioneered the Navigator ministry in Brazil. He is also the acknowledged author of Living Proof, The Insider, and Church Without Walls.

News & Interviews

If you're seeking an fantabulous audiobook, you cannot get wrong with an award-winning recording. Luckily for u.s., each year the Audie Awards option...

Welcome back. Only a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account.

brittonpithe1983.blogspot.com

Source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2312686.Why_Don_t_We_Listen_Better_

Share this post